A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another. John 13:34-35 NIV

When Jesus spoke these words, was there any wiggle room? I’d say Jesus’ language here is pretty airtight. He doesn’t suggest we love, He commands it.

If there is one commandment that is not negotiable, this is it. But why do we struggle with this more than often?

What is love?

Our English word for love is “overworked”. We’ve used it so much that we sometimes forget its true meaning. When I say “I love nasi goreng” and then say “I love my family”, do these words hold the same meaning?

The Greeks actually have 8 different words for love.

• Agape: Unconditional, selfless love. This is the highest form of love – a choice to value others regardless of what they give back.
• Philia: Brotherly love or deep friendship.
• Storge: Familial love.
• Eros: Romantic, passionate love.
• Ludus: Playful, flirting or uncommitted love.
• Pragma: Enduring, practical love.
• Philautia: Self-love. (which can be healthy or selfish)
• Mania: Obsessive or possessive love.

When Jesus commands us to love, He uses Agape. He isn’t forcing us to have “warm feelings” for everyone, that would be naive. He is commanding a specific kind of behaviour. Agape is a love of the will. It is a decision to wish for and work toward someone else’s well-being unconditionally.

Why do we need to love one another?

Genuine love for God is inseparable from love for others. It is like a litmus test for our faith. We cannot truly claim to love an invisible God while disliking the very visible people among us. So loving one another is how we make God’s invisible grace visible to a world that is constantly watching us.

How do we measure love?

If Agape is not a feeling, how do we know if we are actually doing it? We can’t measure it by how nice we feel on any given day. Instead, we measure it by 3 things:

1. Patience
   Agape is measured by what we’re willing to put up with. It’s easy to love people who are like us. The real test is how we treat the person we dislike the most.
2. Action
   Love is a verb. It demands action. For instance, withholding revenge and forgiving someone who doesn’t really deserve it.
3. Sacrifice
   Jesus didn’t just say love people. He gave us a strong benchmark: As I have loved you. It’s measured by our willingness to wash the feet of someone who might later betray us, just as Jesus did. It means true love is measured by sacrifice. What one is willing to die for? Just like what Jesus willingly died for our sins on the cross so that we may be reconciled with God.

Last but not least, Jesus said the world would know us by our love. Not by our buildings, our praise and worship, or our biblical knowledge, but by the way we treat each other when things get tough. So let’s look around this week. Is our love visible or just a word?

Prayer:

Father in Heaven, thank you for reminding us what true love really means. Love isn’t just a word. Thank you for sending your only Son to die on the cross for our sins. May Your love fill us and empower us to love one another so that we can be witnesses of your grace in this world. Amen.