With each passing year, I am more and more convinced that Father’s Day is a really important occasion we ought to have. It is healthy and helpful for us, especially in a society that is not getting easier nor better, to take time to celebrate fatherhood and to acknowledge the fathers’ significant role.

I do not mean that Father’s Day is easy for everyone. Some of you may still have your fathers around, but some have lost yours. Hopefully not many, but few of you with bad fathers may wish you never had them, are forced to celebrate Father’s Day. Some of you may have never known your father. Barna Group’s research highlights that lack of a father’s presence has a significant impact on a child’s well-being, and may lead to increased risks of poverty, emotional challenges, and aggressive behavior. Barna also found that children with strong relationships with their fathers report higher success in careers, marriages, and life.

We understand that relationships require communication from both parties. David Kinnaman, president and major owner of Barna Group, urges Christians, especially fathers, as the leader of the family, to have a healthy relationship so that we can transfer our faith, and teach our children to engage the world as disciples of Christ.

As a father, one of my favorite verses says, “ I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth” (3 Jn. 1:4). And, it is my duty to teach the truth diligently to my children, and to talk of the truth when I sit at home, when I walk by the way, when I lie down, and when I rise up (Deut. 6:7). However, it is not always easy to do all that in front of my children; I struggle much in teaching and living out my faith. If you are doing better than me, praise the Lord! However, if you are struggling just like me, I want to share two things I always do. Not only do these two things help me much in fatherhood, but they are also where I myself get to encounter our God the Father in heaven.

First is the Scripture. Proverbs 20:7 says, “The righteous man walks in his integrity; his children are blessed after him.” Scripture speaks often of the importance of fathers, with the role to provide, protect, instruct, and lead his family in the ways of the Lord. A father’s character and faith have lasting influence, both on his children and on generations to come.

Hebrews 11, known as “Hall of Faith,” offers powerful examples of early fathers who lived by faith. Abraham trusted God’s promise, even when asked to sacrifice his son Isaac. Isaac and Jacob, despite their flaws, passed on blessings by faith. These men were imperfect fathers, but their trust in God made them pillars of faith for their families. Their stories in the Scripture comfort me that fatherhood is not about perfection, but it is about faithful and humble dependence on God.

Second is my journal. While I see the Scripture as God’s way speaking to me, journalling is my time speaking to Him. I started journalling on my device. It is where I tell Him about my daily things, and my prayers to Him. It is not only about praise, honor and thanksgiving, but also complaints and laments. As the relationship has grown, God graciously gave me a second way, writing in a paper journal. This is for my difficult times, especially confessing sins. Friends, let me tell you. Really, God is amazing.

When we truly seek and long for Him, God gives us ways for us to encounter Him. The Psalmist said, “My heart overflows with a pleasing theme; I address my verses to the king; my tongue is like the pen of a ready scribe” (Psalm 45:1). I started writing in physical journals at hurtful times, but it is more than that now. I cannot wait to write my stories to Him! I have told my wife and kids that it is probably the greatest treasure they would inherit, as my journal tells most of my faith journey, which includes my struggle in fatherhood.

Friends, hopefully you get a glimpse of my continuous faith journey in fatherhood. It has never been easy, but it has always been worth it. In the good times I give thanks; in the hard ones I am comforted by the Scripture and journal.

One time, the next day after an argument, my daughter texted me that she wrote something from the heart on how she felt before we talked about yesterday. She also said she was not sure her own writing would help me to understand, as it was mostly about her pouring out emotions. Friends, at that moment, although I knew that what I had said to her was probably right, her writing brought me to tears. I glued her writing into my paper journal.

Friends, children often imitate their fathers as a natural part of development; they learn more from what they see instead of what they hear. As far as I can remember, I never asked her to write. But often I shared with her about my journalling. It makes me ponder, “if she imitates me writing, I hope she imitates me being imitators of God the Father.”

Friends, the world is not getting nicer. Kinnaman said that not only young non-Christians reject the Christian faith, but also a lot of young Christians have left the church and sometimes the faith. Let this Father’s Day be more than just a celebration; let it be a call to action. A call for fathers to renew their commitment to having a deeper relationship with God the Father. A call for families to support, honor, and pray for the fathers in their lives. A call for the church to be a faith community which pays attention to young Christians’ faith, and to pray that none of our children says, “You lost me.”

Suggestions for further resources: 

1. Kinnaman, David. You lost me: why young Christians are leaving church, and rethinking faith. Grand Rapids: Baker Books, 2011.