Some time ago I was praying to God during my devotion time, bringing a list of prayers that I had prayed many times over the years. A thought went through my mind as I prayed, I thought to myself, “Am I bothering God with these same, repetitive prayers?”.

Eventually, I stopped praying these prayers. I tried to be creative by coming up with different prayers each time. But soon after, my motivation to pray ran out. I did not know what to pray for, and when I did, I felt like I was forcing myself to pray for something I did not have the burden for. In the end, my prayer life crumbled.

But in the midst of this mess, God was gracious. I remembered one particular message that was delivered in one of last year’s prayer services. It was about the parable of the persistent widow (Luke 18:1-8). The end of this parable really hit me, for Jesus said that if the unjust judge delivered justice to the widow who was bothersome to him, would not God – who is far more just and gracious – listen to the cry of His people?

And from that message, I learnt one important aspect about prayer: persistence.

Why does God want us to persist in praying?

Persistence, I think, is a very complex trait. On the one hand, it is a highly commendable virtue. We often get praise for being persistent, especially in our conquest to achieve big goals and dreams. 

But the same trait can also be seen negatively. What is seen initially as a reflection of determination and hard work can also be seen as a reflection of being stubborn or being a ‘pushover’. The same person getting praised for not giving up easily may also be seen as stubborn for their reluctance to take ‘no’ for an answer.

In this way, persistence can be both a positive or a negative trait, and how it is valued is dependent on each person.

I used to see persistence as a negative trait. I knew that strong will can be a good thing, but to me, to persist (especially in asking for something to someone repeatedly) felt like an assault to my pride. It made me feel weak and inferior. And so I tried to avoid this trait in my relationships with others.

What I did not realise was that my pride was in the way of my relationship with God too. As I reflect back, I realise that the reason why I did not want to pray persistently was not that I was afraid God would find me bothersome, but it was that the more I brought the prayers to God (and many times, they were not answered immediately), the more I felt small and weak. And it hurt my fragile pride.

And I think this is exactly why God wants us to not cease praying, and even to be persistent like the widow in the parable, because persistence really sheds the skin of our ego. It teaches us humility, because in our weakness and inability, we come to God in hope that He will deliver us and help us. In our persistence, we acknowledge that God is the One who can bring justice to our lives.

Persistent prayer reminds us of our intimate relationship with God

I also think that persistence in prayer reminds us that our relationship with God is not impersonal, but a deep, intimate relationship. In fact, He is our Father and we are His children in Christ. When I was a young, I remember a time where I would beg my parents so often for a camping tent that I really wanted. I would ask them constantly, until I got what I wanted (spoiler: I didn’t get that tent).

But my young self would only be able to do that because I have a deep, intimate relationship with my parents. It was because I knew that I was their child that I could beg them for the things I wanted. It wouldn’t make sense for me to beg someone else’s parents, or my teacher, or even my aunt and uncle.

In the same way with us, it is because in Christ we are called His sons and daughters, we are now able to come to Him as if He is indeed our Father. We can beg God in our prayers, and instead of finding us bothersome, He delights in our persistence, because we are His children.

And lastly, I believe God wants us to persist in our prayer, because it is the time when God aligns our hearts to Him. There are many times where our prayers will not always align with His will. Maybe you want something so badly and you bring it into prayer. But along the journey of praying, somehow the attitude of your heart changes. Maybe you suddenly realise that the thing you strongly desire turns out to have become an idolatry in your heart. Or maybe the Holy Spirit suddenly transforms the way you pray it, from a self-centred mindset to God-centred.

Why I’m saying this is because I believe that our prayer time is a moment of connecting with God. Prayer is our time to communicate with God. And communication should not be one-sided, it’s supposed to be two-way. And I believe that when we pray, it’s not just a moment for us to bring our prayer list to God, but it is the time where He also speaks to us, and many times the way He speaks is through the transformation of our heart’s dispositions.

I hope that this article can encourage all of us, who may perhaps struggle in our prayer life. Maybe you’ve been praying for something for so long: the salvation of your families/friends, for a revival in your personal life or community, etc. There are times when you wonder if it’s worth it to persist in praying any longer. But today I’m telling you this: yes, it’s worth persisting, because God Himself has told us in His Word that He listens to the cry of His people, and He will answer. So don’t stop praying, but ask the Holy Spirit to strengthen you to keep hoping in God.